If you’re going through a breakup, separation, or divorce, you might feel like your nervous system is constantly on edge. One minute you’re convincing yourself you’re fine, and the next you’re crying in your car, scrolling old messages, or binge-watching TV just to quiet your thoughts. Nights can be the hardest—when everything slows down and your mind replays what went wrong, what you should’ve said, or what the future is going to look like now.

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This isn’t just about losing a relationship. It’s about losing the life you thought you were building. And that kind of loss hits deeply. I offer heartbreak, separation, and divorce recovery counselling in Courtenay, BC, with virtual counselling available across Canada, so you don’t have to go through this alone.

 

You Might Be Here Because…

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You Feel Emotionally All Over the Place

You might wake up feeling steady and capable, only to fall apart by mid-afternoon. You miss them—even if you know the relationship wasn’t healthy. You feel angry, then guilty for being angry. You wonder why you can’t just “move on.” None of this means you’re weak or stuck. It means your attachment system is hurting, and your body hasn’t caught up with what your mind already knows.

Co-Parenting Feels Like a Constant Emotional Trigger

If you have kids, separation doesn’t pause your grief. When your children are with your ex, the house feels painfully quiet. You worry about how they’re coping, what they’re being told, and whether you’re doing this “right.” Maybe every exchange with your former partner leaves you shaken or second-guessing yourself. I help clients feel more grounded, confident, and less reactive in this new parenting reality.

You Don’t Trust Yourself the Way You Used To

If you spent years being dismissed, talked over, or subtly made to feel like your needs didn’t matter, it makes sense that you now question your decisions. You might replay conversations, doubt your instincts, or feel unsure about what you want next. In therapy, we gently untangle those patterns and work toward rebuilding self-trust and self-worth—without blaming yourself for how you survived.

Your Emotions Feel Too Big to Manage

You might cry without warning, feel a tight chest when their name comes up, or distract yourself with food, TV, or social media just to get through the evening. Sleep might be broken. Your thoughts might loop endlessly. These aren’t personal failures—they’re signs of a nervous system responding to loss. I offer practical, body-based tools to help you regulate when emotions feel overwhelming, especially in those late-night moments when everything feels heavier.

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My Approach:

I work from a trauma-informed, attachment-focused perspective that recognizes separation as a profound life transition that impacts your nervous system, your identity, and your sense of safety. My practice integrates:

• Transactional analysis to understand how past patterns and childhood experiences influence current reactions

• Somatic interventions (breathwork, tapping, grounding techniques) to help you move from dysregulation to presence

• Psychoeducation about attachment, trauma responses, and nervous system regulation

• Practical boundary-setting and communication strategies for co-parenting and managing difficult relationships

• Pattern identification that helps you understand your triggers and develop healthier responses

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I believe in coming alongside your story with empathy and without judgment. My role isn't to tell you what to do or rush you through your grief—it's to help you understand what's happening, validate your experience, and support you in reclaiming your agency and strength.

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What Clients Appreciate About Working With Me:

• Learning practical regulation tools that actually work in the moment—breathwork, tapping, and grounding techniques you can use when you're triggered at 2am or in the middle of a difficult co-parenting exchange

• Feeling truly heard and understood without judgment, especially when emotions feel messy or contradictory

• Making sense of confusing reactions through psychoeducation about attachment, nervous system responses, and why you might feel drawn to someone who hurt you or panicked when your children choose time with your ex

• Receiving session summaries with reflection questions that help you continue the therapeutic work between appointments and track your progress

• Gaining clarity on what you can and cannot control, which reduces the exhausting mental loops of "what if" and "if only"

• Building stronger boundaries with your ex-partner, family members, and even your children—learning to advocate for your needs while respecting others' autonomy

• Connecting current struggles to deeper patterns from childhood and past relationships, which helps you understand yourself with more compassion and break cycles that no longer serve you

• Moving from feeling like a victim to recognizing your agency—shifting from "this is happening to me" to "I have choices in how I respond and what I build next"

• Having a safe space to process difficult decisions about finances, housing, holidays, and co-parenting without pressure to have all the answers immediately

• Experiencing real change during sessions—arriving dysregulated and leaving with a sense of groundedness, or coming in feeling stuck and leaving with clarity about next steps

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